My Words – Page 2 – Dr. Joy Karavedas

Your Leadership Heritage

“To remember where you come from is part of where you are going.” Anthony Burgess

Armed with a little information from a second cousin in New York, plus anything we could glean from ancestry.com, my husband and I set out this summer to trace his Greek heritage and, hopefully, discover the birthplace of his grandparents. We had been told that there were three cafes in the small village of Ihalia, and a distant cousin owned one of them. We struck gold at cafe number three when we met a lovely young lady adept at using Google translator. Within a short time, we found ourselves chatting with a taxi driver friend of hers – a guy who knew a guy.

He asked us to follow him and we did. He led us outside the town, over the old bridge mentioned by the New York cousin, and up a dirt road with three stone houses. My husband was drawn to the dirt road. He knew. The three stone homes were all abandoned but still standing strong. With his cousin on FaceTime, my husband walked the dirt road and confirmed our find – this was his grandmother’s childhood home, built by her father and nearly destroyed in an earthquake several decades ago.

Walking out of the path, we notice our taxi driver friend talking animatedly with a gentleman outside a modern-looking house across the street. Crossing the street, we were introduced to my husband’s cousin. FAMILY! Our new cousin was the grandson of my husband’s great uncle, and he was just as excited as we were to discover more family.

This excitement grew when our new cousin brought out several large sheets of paper on which were written something that looked like an organizational chart. This cousin had been working on the family tree for the last two years, filling in what he could and leaving blanks where he had no information. Nick’s grandmother’s name was written in pencil on the line with her siblings. There was nothing written under her name – blanks. It was surreal to watch Nick work with his new found relative to add his father’s name, his aunts’ and uncles’ names, and then his own name to the Greek family tree.

This is a great story, but what does it have to do with leadership?

Our past is what made us who we are today. There is a theory in teaching called the Constructivist Theory that states learning occurs by building upon one’s experiences. We construct our knowledge from each of our experiences, and these experiences build together to create understanding. In other words, all of the jobs we’ve had and all of the roles we’ve played will figure into the leader we become. They all help to construct our knowledge of people, of work, and of leadership.

Let this story be a reminder – Never forget where you’ve come from. Remember, …

the jobs you’ve had along the way from your first job at the ice cream shop to your biggest leadership role
the work culture that made you feel alive and helped you thrive
the leader who saw something special in you and pushed you just a bit further than you thought you could go

You are constructing your learning about leadership, building your understanding of leadership.

As you lead others, remember your leadership heritage impacts them too. They are constructing their own leadership learning and writing their own leadership stories. You play the leading role in your own leadership story, but you also play a supporting role in someone else’s story. Let your leadership heritage write a beautiful story for both you and those who follow you.

The Picture is Real

We walked through the small village amazed at every turn. We explored the streets and alleys, taking the time to turn here, look there, stop and see something over there. Walking down a narrow set of stone steps, we turned to look, and there it was – the blue domed, white buildings of Santorini, Greece. It was as if we had stepped into a picture. It was almost spiritual. Rarely, do places resemble the vision in your mind, but Santorini not only resembled my mind picture, it was better.

Taking in Santorini was amazing – reality was so close to the pictures. The experience also made me think about the picture I portray to those who see me lead. Is my leadership like the picture in people’s minds? Beyond leadership authenticity, does my leadership walk match my leadership talk? As one who writes about leadership; there is an expectation that I live out my words. My words cannot be simply words, they must reflect my leadership actions. Santorini brought this concept to life.

Matching the leadership walk to the leadership talk is essential for every leader. Others need to be able to trust that your leadership is a real part of your being, and you believe it.

Authenticity is more than speaking, it is also about doing. Every decision we make says something about who we are.
Simon Sinek

Thinking about leadership as a picture of your character gives a whole new meaning to the term “leader.” We should challenge ourselves to allow our leadership to reflect our true selves. If you don’t mean it, don’t say it. If you can’t live it, don’t promise it.

Leadership looks different on each person. Be sure that your leadership actions clearly depict the leadership picture you have painted for others.

The Leader’s Bookshelf

Readers are leaders and leaders are readers. We’ve heard it since elementary school. While it may seem trite, it’s true. The best leaders I know read and study leadership. They read about other leaders, they read about ideas, they read about theories…they read about everything. There is a diverse mix of books on my leadership bookshelf – some old favorites and some brand new reads. All are useful to my development as a transformational leader, Here are a few of the favorites on my shelf.

The Leadership Challenge by James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner

This is the gold standard of leadership books. Kouzes and Posner combine both practical knowledge with their years of research on leadership to form their model of leadership – the Five Practices of Exemplary Leadership. The five practices are: Model the Way, Inspire a Shared Vision, Challenge the Process, Enable Others to Act, and Encourage the Heart. Developing these leadership skills develops leaders.

Dare to Lead by Brene Brown

Her 2011 Ted Talk on vulnerability was only the beginning for Brene Brown. She is one of the best known authors on vulnerability, leadership, and relationships. With many best sellers to her credit, Brown has successfully moved her career from the academy to the global market. Dare to Lead is the latest edition from Brown’s pen, and it’s as strong as the others. Providing an extra push for leaders, this book is perfect for those needing encouragement and confidence to continue along this leadership journey.

Lead From the Heart by Mark Crowley

Crowley’s book is an easy read. He shares the story of his life and how he rose from scared child to transformational leader. Crowley shares significant facts and data about employee motivation, but I found his discussion of the way the heart “thinks” to be profoundly interesting. According to Crowley, engaging the heart of employees is the key to leadership success.

Emotional Intelligence 2.0 Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

If the heart has a brain, Bradberry and Greaves book about emotional intelligence makes people aware of how to use it. Emotional intelligence is far more than controlling one’s emotions. It calls for an understanding of how thoughts and emotions interact and an awareness of triggers and effects of one’s own emotions.

The Politically Intelligent Leader by Patricia Clark White

Dr. Pat White was instrumental in designing the Doctorate in Organizational Leadership program from which I graduated. When a professor requires their own book for a course, I usually roll my eyes, assuming its a method for boosting book sales. Dr. White’s book is the exception. Her vast experience in leadership allows Pat White to draw upon personal examples to illustrate the struggle between competing priorities and personalities within organizations to guide leaders in understanding how to develop and utilize their political capital.

The next books on my shelf will be Tribes by Seth Godin and Act Like a Leader, Think Like a Leader by Herminia Ibarra. Neither book is new, but both offer continued opportunity for development along my leadership journey.

So, what are you reading?

Stuck in the Middle with You

I’ve written several times about leadership and all the places leaders have influence. I believe leadership occurs at all levels – from entry level to the C-Suite. Everyone has potential to be a leader. To grow into greater roles, a person must manage their influence and use it to lead in whatever position they hold. None of this is new news. I’ve said it. Others have said it. We all know it.

So why do we still get hung up on titles and why are we still dissatisfied in our current positions? I wrote an entire dissertation on developing leadership skills in mid-level leaders. If simple leadership at any level is enough, what’s the point and was all that work in vain? Truth is – maybe it isn’t enough.

As I walked across campus today headed to a meeting with others in similar middle level management positions, I was reminded of a recent conversation in which I lamented a lost leadership opportunity that did not come my way and my desire for greater roles. Although my mind understood that leadership in my middle position was valuable my heart understood it wasn’t my fulfilled desire. It struck me that my unrest might have something to do with the description “middle level.”

Think about it; it’s the middle. The middle is rarely used in a positive manner –in the middle between a rock and a hard place, stuck in the middle with you, in the middle of no where. In most areas of popular culture, the middle doesn’t seem like the best place to be. Most people in the middle are stuck there by chance and not choice; they are hungrily waiting for a chance to get out. It’s hard to lead from a place you are trying to leave.

How do we make the best of it? A couple months ago, I wrote about five things necessary to lead in the middle and move forward from that place. One of those things was go the extra mile – over deliver. This is extremely important to those in the middle – it’s also extremely difficult. Middle leaders must seek opportunities to do strong, promotable work that benefits the organization in order to prove their value and heighten their impact. But they must carry out their action in a manner that is not self-seeking or desiring recognition. Is this even possible?

Motivation is key. This impacting work must benefit the organization and not exist solely for the benefit of the leader. Work that is self-promoting and inconsiderate of organizational goals and mission is easily seen for its egocentric nature. True leadership impact is best achieved through authentic leadership designed to move the team and organization forward and not simply benefit the leader. Any leadership benefit becomes a byproduct rather than the original product.

My challenge to all of you Middle Leaders is this – check yourself, and check yourself often. Find your WHY. As Simon Sinek said,

“People don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it. What you do simply proves what you believe.”

You were originally attracted to the heart of your organization, its mission. Don’t forget it; instead, let it be your motivation and your impetus for continuing to give all of yourself. Remember why you are there and why you care. I cannot guarantee you will receive a promotion. I cannot even say your work will be noticed. I can promise, however, that you will find renewed love for your work and purpose in whatever position you are in.

Reflections on Becoming Dr. Karavedas – No. 12

I was in line with the colleagues and friends I had made through the program. Someone somewhere told us to begin walking. In the distance, I could just make out Pomp and Circumstance. The moment I walked through the door, it became real. Suddenly, I became emotional. This was the end of the journey, the moment I had dreamed about and worked tremendously hard to realize. Or, perhaps, it’s just the beginning – the beginning of a new journey…a journey that will lead to new dreams and new places.

As the Dean placed the doctoral hood over my head to welcome me into the academy, I realized I was part of the next generation of doctors eager to take on the world.

Only 1% of the people in the United States can call themselves doctors.

Academics, researchers, experts, and scientists – we come from many different places and are headed out to even more. The one thing we have in common is that none of us reached this destination alone. My doctorate is a significant accomplishment, but it is not mine alone. It would not have been realized without those who have gone before me, walked alongside me, and will follow after me on this journey.

I dedicate my work to …

My Dissertation Chair, Dr. Jeffrey Lee – the scholarly expert whose advice, support and expertise consistently challenged me and made me better; beyond that, he provided vision for the future I couldn’t always see.

My Dissertation Committee, Dr. Andrew Barton and Dr. Cheryl Marie Osborne Hansberger – the support team whose gentle guidance was consistent and always available.

My Cohort Sisters, Dr. Tess Breen and Sister Dr. Mary Amanda Nwagbo – the women who traveled alongside me during this journey and provided strength, drive, fun, and maybe a glass of wine or two, along the way. You truly are my sisters.

My Grammy, Esther Tune – a woman so far ahead of her time she couldn’t see the impact she would have on those who followed after her. I will always be indebted to her for my strength, my resolve, and my endless quest to know more.

My Mom, Jean Davidson – the woman who taught me I could do whatever I set my heart to and the future was a wide-open door.

My Grandchildren, Allison, Kara, Nicholas, Kyle, and Joseph – the joy of my life and the future that drives my legacy. Each of you is strong, brave, and full of potential to impact the world. Nana loves you all.

My Family, Peter, Ashley, Erin, LJ, and Joseph – the ones who keep me grounded and help me remember who I am is just as important as who I want to be. It is my joy and pleasure to watch you journey through life. I am so very proud of each of you.

And, finally, my Husband, Nick Karavedas – the man who has loved and supported me unconditionally for over 37 years. Without your willingness to sacrifice your own needs and desires for mine, I would not be Dr. Karavedas. I love you more than you know.

Personal Reflections on Lessons Learned from Leadership Fails

My best successes came on the heels of failures – Barbara Corcoran

It’s often said that we learn best from our mistakes. This is particularly true in leadership. Leadership situations are unpredictable and often call for spontaneous decision-making. While each of us can draw upon wisdom gained from past experiences and emotional intelligence gained from personal growth, we may still miss the target on occasion. Reflecting on the lessons learned from these leadership fails is the best way to make sure to get it right the next time.

Most leaders understand the organizational impact gained from empowering team members to pick up a project and run with it. However, knowing when to let someone run with the ball and how far to let them go can be tricky to navigate. I remember a situation in which a team member had some pretty good ideas but they appeared too far out of the comfort zone for our organization. In fact, I remember one 20-minute conversation based on “thinking outside the box while remaining in the box.” What does that mean anyway? It turns out, he was right. It was time to push our organization a little further than it was comfortable. Rather than stifling this team member’s creativity, my role should have been to help organizational leaders understand the need to take risk and see the possibilities. I am happy to say that team member is still with the organization and has been doing great things to move it forward.

Another complicated situation is conflict between a team member and a customer. Team members want your support and customers firmly believe they are always right. Usually, neither party is all right or all wrong. In one instance, I had a team leader who had been given authority over a particular project. Exercising that authority, the team leader assigned a large penalty due to the customer’s mistake. Both parties brought the matter to me to mediate; neither felt they were out of line. After thorough review, I agreed with the customer believing the infraction did not warrant the penalty assessed. This caused significant animosity between the team leader and me, which was never fully repaired. I believe my decision was the right decision, but I could have handled the situation better. First, if there were restrictions on the team leader’s authority, I should have made that clear from the beginning of the project. Also, once conflict began, it would have been beneficial to step in earlier before the situation progressed too far (although there were some challenges in this case that made that impossible). As such, I was brought in to “clean things up” and had little opportunity to work out a better solution.

The most difficult leadership situations can involve those who lead you. My largest leadership fail falls under this description. Understanding how to address a conflict in leadership is of utmost important to leaders at all levels. In my specific situation, a project had been removed from my oversight without explanation. I had received superior reviews up to that point from within and outside the organization. I had even been promised additional projects based on my handling of the specific project. My direct supervisor could not provide explanation as to why the project was being taken from me and only offered promises of opportunities in other areas. Her responses made it clear she was being directed from someone above her, and I chose to confront that person. I made several mistakes during this confrontation – 1) I allowed my emotions to lead the confrontation; 2) I put my thoughts in writing (email) rather than meeting personally; and 3) I made insinuations that the situation was politically motivated. Each of these was a mistake, but together, they could have spelled disaster. Fortunately, this person is an amazing leader. She was able to model true leadership through a discussion that followed my poor confrontation choice. While I never received a solid explanation for the decision, I gained a significant lesson in managing people in distress and handling leadership conflict.

Zig Ziglar said, “If you learn from defeat, you haven’t really lost.” I would add that if you haven’t failed in leadership, you may not be leading. None of us is perfect, and fortunately, perfection is not required of leadership. Leaders who are vulnerable enough to admit their mistakes and learn from them are successful leaders.

Leading from the Middle: Using Your Influence to Lead Others and Improve Your Own Position

“Leadership is a choice, not a position.” Stephen Covey

I once spent two months discussing, negotiating, talking about – ok arguing about – a title for my position. I lost that argument. For the next two years I learned to live with a title I didn’t like, and then I was promoted. Until I truly understood that leadership did not depend upon a title or position, it was difficult for me to feel successful in leadership. For many years, I tied my leadership value to my perceived achievement and the recognition of others.

I know differently now.

A title or position has nothing to do with leadership. Leadership begins within and is demonstrated through actions. Each of us has influence in whatever position we find ourselves, and the manner in which you use that influence impacts the lives of those around you and the life of your organization. The truth is we all lead every day. The problem is with our own view of leadership. Who chooses the restaurant for dinner? Who makes the phone call to a sad friend? Who is given the extra project at work because the boss knows it will be done? Who follows up to make sure the client is satisfied? All these are the actions of a leader. The leader understands what is needed and makes it happen.

Position isn’t everything but position can still be important. How do you move yourself out of your current position and into a more senior leadership position? There are a few things you can do to demonstrate leadership within your current role that might help you move into a new leadership role – one with a title you like.

Act with Integrity – Your character and integrity should be the place where your leadership begins. Plus, even a person with no integrity respects a person who has it.

Lead Well in All Places – Never look at a job or position as small or beneath you. Embrace the position and give it all you have. You will be rewarded.

Go the Extra Mile – In a recent article, Suzy Welch said if you want to get promoted, “you need to over-deliver.” She’s right. It’s also important that you give credit where credit is due – your team. Over-delivering results is beneficial to your organization and crediting your team demonstrates your ability to lead.

Network Continuously – Leadership is about influence and networking allows you to build influence. Building strategic relationships is beneficial to you, your team, and your organization.

Stay Away from the Drama – Most senior leaders don’t have the time or desire to participate in the office drama. You shouldn’t either.

A title doesn’t make you a leader. But, if you lead well in the smaller positions, you just might find yourself wearing a new title – the one you really want.

People Who Need People: The Fine Art of Networking

“The best way to lead people into the future is to connect with them deeply in the present.” – James Kouzes & Barry Posner

Leadership doesn’t happen in a vacuum. We are people who need people and not just people to follow us around because we are the leader. We need people to walk ahead of us and beside us and with us. My recent research on leadership skills development indicated that successful leaders maintain a broad network of professional relationships. Effective leaders look beyond themselves and establish a wide variety of relationships with assorted influencers.

My husband is a natural at networking. Give him an hour in a room and he will know the names of half the people in the room and have made lunch arrangements with most of those. My approach is a little different, but it works well for my style. Networking is simply getting to know people and building relationships. Everyone has the ability to do that and, with the right perspective, I believe most may even find it fun. Whether you are a natural at networking or you need a little encouragement to start down that path, these tips can guide your steps:

Be Curious – Networking is simply meeting a variety of people and getting to know them. Stay curious and open your mind to the different people around you at work, across your organization, at conferences, in classes, etc. Take a genuine interest in their stories. You may find that you actually enjoy this, and you will definitely make valuable professional relationships.

Be Authentic – You can only be you. If you try to be anyone else, it will be obvious and it is not a good start to any relationship. It may be tempting to inflate your accomplishments or knowledge level when meeting someone further along in the leadership journey. Resist that temptation. The best senior leaders relish the opportunity to share stories and impart wisdom to those still along the path. Feel free to ask their input and allow them to share their expertise.

Be Willing – The time to start is now. Building professional relationships takes time, but it is time well spent. One conversation may not lead to your next promotion, but you never know where it will lead without engaging in it. Prepare a list of people you’d like to get to know better and invite one of them to coffee. Make a game of gathering business cards or contact information at your next conference. If it’s good enough for Nike, it’s good enough for you – just do it!

A strategic network of mixed relationships sparks innovation and creativity, reinforces decision-making skills, and supports future organizational growth. Providing a diverse look at leadership styles through a mixed group of professional relationships can play an integral role in your leadership success. Without exception, if you are a mid-level leader or just beginning the leadership journey, establishing a broad professional network is invaluable to your career. We cannot lead alone. Building a broad network of professional relationships ensures that we don’t have to.

Gold Star for You

The quality of a leader is reflected in the standards
they set for themselves.
Ray Kroc

My recent research revealed that affirmation plays a critical role in building leadership confidence, and confidence gives leaders the boost they need to lean into their potential. As we set standards and develop characteristics to guide our leadership, it feels good to have others recognize these qualities. Affirmation acknowledges the diversity of leadership skills and experiences we have developed, validates their value, and provides impetus for continued growth. High standards yield extraordinary results in us and in others.

It is important to recognize the value of affirmation and build it into our leadership practices. However, some environments make it difficult to find someone willing to tell us how wonderful we are at leadership or anything else. Sometimes affirmation must come from within. Bradley Cooper was asked in a recent interview whether he was angry because he did not receive an Oscar nomination for directing A Star is Born. His answer was no, because he knew “he had done good work.” Bradley Cooper did not need affirmation from others to value the work he had done. He knew it was good and he was proud of it.

Although I’m not an Oscar nominated actor, I had a similar experience when I recently defended my dissertation. Rather than deflect and play down the congratulations I received from others, I found it easy to simply say thank you. I worked hard for this, and I believe in it.

Setting high standards for your work and leadership sets an example for others to follow. It feels good to have others affirm these standards, but doing high quality, good work feels great too. Remember, recognize and affirm potential in others, but appreciate your own good work as well. And when necessary …

Give Yourself Your Own Gold Star!

Reflections on Becoming Dr. Karavedas – No. 11

Dear Dr. Joy Karavedas…

That’s how the letter began…Dear Dr. Joy Karavedas. That’s right, I did it;

I am Dr. Joy Karavedas

On February 15, 2019, I defended by dissertation in front of my friends and family. I am now one of the 2% of Americans who hold a doctorate degree. As I told my family, this has been the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life and also the most rewarding. I have been fortunate to have found success throughout most of my academic career, but this was different. I earned a degree, but I received much more than a paper degree and a title.

The doctoral process changed me. The coursework and readings moved me from a person who studied leadership to a person who understood leadership to an expert on leadership. My passion for the topic has grown just as I have. I get excited to discuss leadership standards and characteristics. My face lights up when I share methods for tapping into the leadership potential in others.

True leaders don’t create follows, they create more leaders.
Tom Peters

I am hopeful that those who read my study will be reminded of their own leadership journey and be encouraged to dig deeper into their understanding of investing in the leadership growth of others. Embracing the belief that people are an organization’s most valuable resource, I want organizations to invest in leadership growth and development to strengthen the pipeline of well-prepared candidates for future leadership roles. Most important emerging leaders to lean into their ambition and develop the skills necessary for leadership growth.

My dissertation journey is complete. The future – what’s next? The specifics are still to be determined. I love my current position, but I look forward to move into a new arena as well. One thing is certain, drkaravedas.com will become a bit more active now. With dissertation complete, I have so much to share with the world. Stay tuned!